Hello Everybody:) I usesd to use meth daily for several years. Since the age of around 16. I am 24 now and I have been clean for almost 2 months. It doesn't sound like very long, or really feel that long either. My mind is so clear and my concious is even more clear. And I swear I will never go back to that way of life again.I was what you would call a "functioning addict" as in I went to my job everyday, and lived a seemingly normal life to most people around me, yet everyday, several times a day, I would smoke a bowl (of meth) in the bathroom at work and come home and smoke it all night sometime's not sleeping for days. Even though I would try and hide it, once I came clean and told all those around me, they were surprised yet they all thought something was not right. They thought it was because of the fact that I "used to do drugs" because I had told them that I quit. Now, they like being around me cause my behavior is no longer unpredictable, and I have become a truely reliable person and employee.
I have not been to any treatment/rehab... I quit fully on my own free will.With the love and support of my loving boyfriend who was also a "functioning addict". We had been doing it everyday, every moment possible for the last 4 years, and had been doing it quite often on and off for a few years before that too. My life, our lives were full of craziness and stress. I was such a happy positve person, and loved being around others as well as making others happy and feel good about themselves.
Then once I was a hardcore addict, none of that mattered anymore. I felt so sad like I had lost a part of me, like all of my potential and that special thing that I had to make others feel happy and open and want to be around me was gone. I no longer laughed.
And that was one of the things that I had missed the most (for years I just didn't laugh) You know the kind of deep hearty laugh that comes from your diaphram? The one that's almost a cackle? The one that feels so good? Well I have it again. And I make other's feel good and smile. Some thing else I HAD MISSED!
